My May blog challenge

And here is May. It looks beautiful outside. Clear and blue.

Ive decided to set myself the challenge to blog each day. For my future reading pleasure if not anything else. It’s such an exciting part of my life right now I want to remember every detail.

I feel very inspired to make some adjustments to our lives also, to reconnect us better. Our screen time is too high, I would like to hope by the end of May I feel more comfortable with what we are doing.

So my May focuses are

  • Introduce more Montessori inspired thinkings into our home
  • reduce our screen times
  • plan ahead better for our mealtimes
  • rebalance finances
  • continue to look into new houses and the decor for the boys and girls
  • Blog every day!
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2019

For some reason I thought I’d been on here more recently than this.

Well here we are in 2019. I’ve tried dry January and already failed. I’ve tried healthy eating and kind of stuck to it. I’ve tried regularly exercising but that’s fallen flat as I can’t seem to find the time.

But maybe I should just stop with the constant to do lists, the eternal beating myself up for not doing enough, the strive to be this perfect image in my mind. Because if I really thought how I could possibly achieve that perfect image it would mean basically forgetting my children and that’s not what I want to do.

Not easy to admit but I am not going to be a famous rich person. Somehow I just thought that would 100% happen at some point. I will never have a mansion. A super car. Staff. My children won’t attend private school. We will have a middle of the road, mediocre life, albeit full of love and fun and adventures and laughter. I will try to savour every moment.

Appearance

Tonight I’m cross about my appearance. I’ve had that thing happen that i thought I looked ok when I left the house today and then someone’s taken a video of me and I’m shocked at the person on the screen.

So I’m doing a little exercise to set my mind at rest.

Why don’t I like what I saw?

Looked fat, hair looked greasy and messy, teeth looking yuk, clothes look drab

What can I do about these things?

Lose weight, wash hair, teeth whitened, nicer wardrobe

When and how?

Start gym classes January. Start showering every 2 days. Teeth booked for feb. Wear my nicer clothes I own.

What could get in my way?

January will be super busy at riverside. Wont have time for showers and doing hair. Don’t like straighteners and not good at curling. Whitening costs money. Don’t like clothes as don’t fit.

Plan of action:

Weight loss: riverside membership and call up early each week. Mon, tues, wed and fri. Or consider village gym

Hair: should be showering and doing hair at gym. Ask Mel about straighteners or have to buy new.

If showering at home make sure I have enough time each morning but getting enough sleep and leaving house today each evening

Teeth: February. Just do it.

Clothes: wear everything once. Toss what I don’t love and get new wardrobe end of jan if stuck with gym.

If I can’t work I can’t work. Don’t feel pressured.

Minimalist Christmas

I thought I would have been a pro at this Christmas thing by now, having celebrated 34 of them, 12 as a mum. But I still feel anxious and guilty I’ve not done enough, not decorated my house enough, not bought enough presents, not taken the children on enough magical experiences.

Have taken today to think what I can do about these negative feelings as I don’t want to dread December every year.

So number 1:

Take the pressure off myself. Stop all the talk with the children about lists and presents and Santa. I don’t think it’s useful at all. Keep the gifts to a minimum come Xmas day. Small stocking and a couple of gifts to unwrap. The children don’t expect to have mountains of presents.

Number 2: keep the decorating to a minimum too. Wobbling on ladders and upping my electric bill just for others to see as they drive past? A visit to the 4 special houses locally one evening will be enough. A tree in the lounge, and couple of hallway pieces will do. The children don’t even care about the trees in their bedrooms.

Number 3: try to send cards early and then it’s done. A photo card would be nice.

Number 4: just view the day as a normal Sunday roast day with a few special extras.

Busy busy burnt out

Well the last 6 weeks have really taken their toll on me and I have been left feeling in a bit of a daze and a bit numb.

I definitely had too much on my plate and have counteracted this by deciding this is my last few months of school helping and trying to practise saying no and not taking on anything new.

I’m craving a simple quiet life, although I don’t know if I can actually live that way. But I definitely can’t sustain the amount of projects I’m currently juggling.

I’d like to focus 2019 on my family, my finances and travelling. Minimalism challenges, frugal living, staying house proud, making an effort in my appearance.

There is no finish line

Have just read some good advice that helps me with my incorrect way of thinking about ‘I’ll finally be happy when…’ mentality.

There is no finish line, it’s not a race, it’s a garden. It’s about maintaining. A garden will always have weeds, sometimes we’re strong enough and have enough time and energy to work on those weeds, and sometimes we just have to allow them to stay there.

But there are also flowers. The flowers will grow if you allow them to grow and give them room. Keep checking on them, keep pulling the weeds.

And maybe your garden doesn’t look like you imagined it would. But it’s yours and a nice place to sit and look around. Keep going with it.

Gardening is a process, not a problem or a project that can be solved. Weeds will grow, but we’ll get better and better at pulling them up. And there will be flowers, too.

Busy busy

Not sure if I’m feeling overwhelmed or just really excited but looks like I’ve might be getting even busier soon.

Have agreed to take on another friends group to help fund raise for our local park. Feel obligated to help as it’s our local play area and benefits so many families, and without help it could disappear.

On top of that is another interesting opportunity but I’m not so sure about this one. Silly really as this is the only one I could see me making any money in!

On top of all my projects out of the house I’ve taken it on myself to try and redecorate the whole house as well so my time is seriously stretched at the moment but I’m not bothered, I am enjoying feeling super busy and with a constant to do list. I know there’s nothing I can do to get out of it all, I have to just keep powering through to the other end. The house work will get finished and I can relax then a little. That’s at least what I imagine!

Sober October benefits

Have taken part in sober October and apart from a little slip up at the end of a very stressful day, I’ve stayed strong and it’s made me feel so much better.

Anxiety is down, positivity is up, motivation and productivity is through the roof. A fog has been lifted and I’ve no doubt that was the constant rollover mini hangovers I’d have been suffering from the poor quality sleep and dehydration.

I slipped up once, and went to slip up again but pulled myself back. I understand the consequences now and I really like this new sober person I’ve found hiding now the clouds have been lifted.

Even my paranoia has been improving, I can’t stop being me, I can only stay genuine in who I am and if people don’t like me thats their business. Most people don’t even like themselves!